The TUPS Stress Management Program
- Each participant will receive a personalized license key allowing them unlimited access to the TUP website at www.tups.co
- The participant will be able to determine their own username and password which ensures complete anonymity and confidentiality
- The participants will be assessed on-line prior to the course by completing six- pre-course questionnaires. This is an interactive testing site providing them with immediate feedback in terms of their current level of functioning, their current level of stress as well as any symptoms and diseases. Finally, they will be assessed for any indications of depression and/ or anxiety. If these are worrying, the participant will be alerted via email as to their need to consider complementary therapy
- The delegate will also receive a full nutrient report which indicates their individual need for any nutrient supplementation. This report is highly individualized as it takes into account their current level of functioning, their stress levels as well as their current level of health. This nutrient requirement is unique to their profile. This allows them the opportunity to take the appropriate nutrient supplementation during the course and a maintenance supplementation after the course
- Suggestions will be made as to an overall understanding of healthy eating
- The participant will be given free access to the e-book “Faster, Better, Sicker; Time Urgency Perfectionism Stress and Your Health”, the second edition of the book culminating in 23 years of research and experience
- Each participant will have access to their own home page on the TUP Stress Management website. This site has access to the TUP Stress Management Program. It is a highly interactive site which analyzes their stress into a TUP Stress Cycle
- The participants will be provided with their own TUP Stress Workbook, which is a manual consisting of worksheets for the period of the course. This allows them to complete their daily homework tasks in a workbook which can later be transferred onto the internet site. The website can be placed on their cell phone as an application which is user-friendly
- The course is divided into ten sessions, following the testing
- Each session consists of the following:
A summary reading of the course material
A detailed reading of the session
A ten-minute clip explaining the detail of the session
7- daily motivational 1-minute video clips, used to motivate you
An on-line workbook to complete the tasks for the day
- Following the course, the delegates will be re-assessed in order to determine their progress along the course in terms of changes in stress, symptoms and diseases as well as anxiety and depression
So began the sometimes difficult, at times, even embarrassing process of modifying my behaviour. As a result, I am less irritable, less tired, more relaxed and easier to be around. I have more time to do the things I need to do and so get them done better. I am more effective as I am calmer and more efficient. I've stopped clock- watching and have been late on occasion and not panicked about it as I would have in the past. I feel more in control of my world and I am less affected by the actions of others. I have also started to listen to my inner voice that I have suppressed for so long and am doing what I want to do as opposed to what I've always felt I have to do. If I do find myself slipping back into the old ways, I have many little reminders that keep me on track. I am still in the process of changing and keep finding ways to improve and develop – so the course benefits continue long after it's over. This self-help internet-based course has literally changed my life – and in the long term – saved my life.
Wendy, 30 years, married
We were married for a year when we realized there was a problem in conceiving. I was diagnosed as a time urgent perfectionist by my fertility specialist. He drew pictures of what happens to the body when you suffer from this syndrome. He started telling me the kind of person I was and everything he said was totally true. He even described how I am in traffic, how I get out of the car and I am literally boiling with anger. I hate having to wait for anybody. If I want something done properly, I prefer to do it myself. Six weeks after completing the course, I fell pregnant. I believe wholeheartedly that learning how to control my temper and manage stress had a huge part in my being able to conceive. I want to consider myself blessed that I had physical problems at a young age so I was made alert to my stress. I am trying to raise my daughter to be aware of how her mind can affect her body. I continue to refer to my course notes and check my specific stress template when I feel I reverting to being TUP stressed. I am maintaining my changes and no longer feel overwhelmed or depressed.
Kari, 26 years, 1 child, married
My pregnancy was a difficult one and a high risk one. I worked from 7 am until 10 pm. I wanted to conceive again, but realized I was stressed. If a bowl was in the wrong place, it would stress me. Even if my boss said my work was fine, I needed to redo my document, every time, before I could send it out. Two spaces instead of one after a full stop would be a big mistake. I was an aggressive and impatient driver. Dr Rodrigues explained to me that such a learned stress like impatience or anger secreted noradrenaline and cortisol. People with this personality type have trained themselves to have this continuous learned stress. I did the course and five weeks later was pregnant again. I have learnt how to calm myself down. The course taught me that I don't have to be perfect I don't have to worry what people think of me. I have become more assertive socially and at work. Before, I just used to keep quiet and do everything I was given. Now I just say: "I am busy." People respond to me more positively.
Stella, 34 years, 2 children, married
I used to set off for work at 7am to miss the traffic. I worked in a busy accounts department where I insisted on meeting my deadlines without fail and to my detriment. At the end of a working day, I couldn't leave the office before my in-tray was empty. When I got home, I usually got home after 6pm, I worked equally as hard to keep the place neat and tidy. When I eventually sat to watch tv, I also read at the same time. I think doing one thing at a time is a waste of time. I ate, walked spoke and lived at top speed. I was then informed that I had what has been dubbed the career woman's disease (TUP stress). This means I was a perfectionist who took on too much work in an attempt to prove myself. My entire life was always a race against the clock. Following the course, I felt 100% healthier. I never knew how seriously your psychological condition could affect your physical condition. I always thought it was a strange New Age idea but now I've found the physical evidence in my own body. I am now able to identify my own irrational ways of thinking to pave the way for positive change. I've learnt to relax, my self-worth is better and my time management has improved. I am less worried about the impression I make on people. I am more happy and at peace with myself.
Caroline, 26 years, married
My best friend says and does things that used to stress me. She sees the changes and keeps saying "you would have stressed before. What has happened?" I can now be more realistic about my targets at work and am able to switch off from work when I get home. I feel very relaxed. I simply think differently about my life now.
Charlene, 26 years, single
My house used to be a big stress. The way I have evaluated my change is due to the fact that I can leave a wet towel on the bed and go relax instead of rushing around and putting it in the tumble dryer. My husband spends more time with me.
Antoinette, 34 years, married
I use all I have learned at work. My colleagues keep commenting on how calm I am in situations when I used to get so stressed. I recognize my hooks. People around me have responded well so I am constantly reinforced for managing my stress better. I don't make issues anymore about small things - so I longer feel embarrassed. I've become a Jimmy Swaggart about the course - I tell everyone about it… I preach about it…
Janine, 37 years, married
It has changed the way I think. My procrastination is way down. I used to be more anal - but I handle that better. I don't even look at the clock anymore - even in my car. It's constantly on the temperature gauge as I've realized that it is probably one of my biggest hooks. Now I simply get on with what I have to without constantly worrying about the time. And I find I get most things done!
Megan, 32 years, married
The nature of my job is stress. It is constant deadlines, it is crisis management, and it's not going to change. If I didn't learn to manage the stress or react in a positive way, I may have well dropped out of the workforce and take on a job less rewarding and less competitive. As a Type B, I am surviving. I no longer feel I am bailing water out of a sinking boat, and my puppy is recognizing me again as I spend more time at home.
John, 31 years, married
This is not merely a vague concept of stress which is wishy-washy. It is a highly specific way of looking at stress with specific skills to manage it. I feel empowered and I no longer have the swollen glands I used to have or the constant colds. I enjoy my meals, I don't just eat because I have to eat in two minutes. I enjoy preparing my food, and don't mind if I am late anymore.
Jenny, 39 years, single
I've noticed a change in everything. I am more assertive now even though I would rather choose to avoid conflict. But I can manage to say no without conflict. I am still aware of my hooks constantly. They are easier to recognize. I don't have that knot in my stomach when I open the office door in the morning. That was habit, and I realized I was creating my own stress.
Paul, 40 years, 2 children, married
I stopped setting unrealistic deadlines all the time. I work from an action plan. It is a list that is manageable, realistic and achievable.
Martin, 37 years, married
I have clarity of thought. I no longer have pressured thought where my thoughts are constantly racing. I can think of one thing at a time. I can decide to do one task and complete it instead of trying to do everything at once and finishing nothing.
Gregory, 33 years, married
I get to work at 8am instead of 6am. And I still get everything done. I still hide files and paperwork in the cupboard when it's not yet done, but I don't feel stressed by it anymore. I try to manage things one at a time. I need to practice the skills I've learnt but I have them and can implement them when necessary. I can recognize when I need to implement a skill. Things might still stress me but then I stop myself and say "you have a choice now". That forces me to implement the skills I have learned. I now take the responsibility instead of feeling out of control or overwhelmed. I feel in control.
Andrew, 45 years, married
Since doing the course, my priorities have changed. I am setting new priorities in life, the most important one, to be happy…
Theresa, 33 years, married
This course has given me as a time urgent perfectionistic person - a choice. To know that you have a choice in the matter makes all the difference. Thank you.
Carl, 30 years, single
The course enabled me to see how time urgent I am and most importantly, it offered me a solution as to how I could work through the time urgency without becoming less efficient or less productive, therefore improving my lifestyle.
Sandy, 26 years, married
The course made me become aware of my time urgent and perfectionistic behaviour, and guided me on corrective action.
Dean, 21 years, single
Basically, what I drew out of the course was the ability to 'let go' by examining myself - my goals and all that matters to me in life. I can once again see the good things in life, and am enjoying life again from a fresh perspective for the first time in two years. My 'personal fight with myself' is over at long last.
Karen, 30 years, married
I recommend this course to all women - endometriosis sufferers or not.
Carol, 50 years, married
My first impression when I heard about the course was that I'd heard it all before. I knew myself inside out, was an avid reader of self-help books, so there could be nothing new for me to learn. Boy, was I wrong! When I heard the definition of a typical time urgent perfectionist, the description fitted me so well, I felt decidedly uncomfortable. Well, I'm happy to say that the course is just what I needed. I was hooked as each week passed and provided me with deeper insights into myself. And the tools to manage my life style.
Diane, 30 years, married
I went through the TUPS Stress management course when I was trying to fall pregnant and struggling with infertility issues. I work in a highly stressfully corporate environment and have a typical 'A type' personality which definitely didn't help during the very stressful journey to motherhood. The TUPS course taught me how to put stress into perspective and to really look at what you can and can't control and made me aware of not stressing the small things. I was very fortunate to be blessed with twin girls following our first IVF procedure and they are now 13 years old! During this journey I still see Mandy from time to time when things get tough and it just reminds me of the TUPS thinking and helps to reiterate what is important in life and where to focus my energy. As my girls are growing up and having to deal with their own personalities and some of the difficult lessons that life throws you as a teenage girl, I refer back to so many wonderful learnings that I received from the TUPS course and use these to support them and help them to navigate life, which at times can be difficult.
Mandy, 46- years old, Married, CA, 2 children
We live in a world where we are pressed to go faster and deliver our best at all times. For some people this is a source of great stress, as they always want to always deliver perfectly and in time (if not before time). If this is you then this is the course for you. TUPS taught me to recognize my stress triggers and gave me the tools to manage and prevent stress reactions. Mandy is kind and patient and will hold your hand through each step of the process. It’s time to invest in yourself and your future.
Tammy, 41- years old, Married, Project Manager
The TUPS course provided me with enlightening insight as to why I suffer from anxiety and stress and how best to deal with it. The skills-based aspect of the course is practical and provided real solutions to assist me in my daily endeavours. Mandy Rodrigues is extremely knowledgeable, particularly in relation to (in)fertility and related issues. Her support and the support of the TUPS course has been tremendously valuable and helpful to me on my fertility journey.
Angela, 33- years old, Married, 1 child, Attorney
After our first contact following uncontrollable medical issues, my A-Type Personality was identified and I started on the self-formulated TUPS Program. This program was exceptionally successful in not only accepting my fertility decision but also other aspects of my life that I had not realized needed improvement. As a structured, proactive, over-caring and over-ambitious individual I was very hard on myself even for the simplest of responsibilities eg. if I didn’t arrive at least 5 minutes before any type of appointment and then would worry how to prevent it from happening again. TUPS is made out of 10- modules that I followed through from day 1 and they still play a role subconsciously until today. I have become more aware of personal and career choices and I have learnt to let go of certain tasks and worries that didn’t deserve all that attention. And guess what? Not only did I feel like a more relaxed happier woman that still met all my expectations but by some miracle I fell pregnant naturally just a month after I had completed my course. I now have a beautiful baby and I feel on top of the world
Angelique, 38- years, Married, 1 child, CA
Mandy literally saved my life, we met her before our first round of IVF. She took what was an incredibly stressful situation and made it manageable, whenever I felt like I was going to lose my mind, she was there, holding my hand and guiding me through. Mandy speaks from experience, she has been through it, it gives her an insight you rarely find from a therapist, it means she really knows what you are going through - I always had the feeling I was in safe hands. Following the death of my father I had a complete breakdown and Mandy was there to help me pick up the pieces. She did more than save my life, she brought me forward and showed me I could break, it was okay, and I was safe. I wouldn't be the person I am without her. She has helped me individually and helped my marriage through couples counselling. Infertility is multifaceted it isn't just one thing, and if you are in it you need a therapist that gets it and gets you. I cannot recommend Mandy enough, she has been the guiding light I needed in a dark place and in so many ways is more than a therapist, she is a friend. IVF and life in general are stressful, Mandy has amazing tools not only to measure your stress but also to give you vital tools to manage them, if you are undergoing fertility treatment this is something you cannot do without, it helped tremendously in keeping my stress under control and I still apply the methods to everyday life today
Roxanne, 30- years, Married, 1 child, Business owner
I highly recommend the TUPS Course! I thought I was handling stress just fine, but it started affecting my health, my work and personal life. I had no idea people were walking on eggshells around me, scared they would be the one to cause the final snap. This course helped me recognize my hooks (triggers), what my internal reactions were to them, and how to adjust that and be able to handle life and it's highs and lows, to the fullest! I am very grateful to have been able to do this course before everything fell apart.
Janice, 33- years, Married, 1 child, Accounts Manager
I’ve been seeing Mandy since last year August. I can absolutely say it’s the best decision I ever did made and I don’t think and I don’t think I’d be alive today if it wasn’t for Mandy. She has helped me deal with my darkest fears, irrational triggers and helped me with relationships I would’ve destroyed if I hadn’t been seeing Mandy. She has helped me live again. I am very grateful for what she has offered me during this time. Mandy honestly saved my life. Thank you for always going above and beyond and helping me live again.
Michelle, Catering Business, Married, 32- years, one child
Where do I start? Mandy has been my rock and support since 2018.Mandy has walked a rocky road with me over the past 2 and a half years, she has supported and guided me through an infertility battle, a divorce, rehoming my precious dogs, selling my marital home and adjusting to a new way of life which included venturing into the dating world again. The biggest role Mandy has played in my life this far, is sitting next to me holding my hand, when I received the devastating news that I had stage 4 cancer, without her guidance, love and support I would not have known how to deal with the traumatic and uncertain future that the diagnosis has bought and all the life changes I will have to make. Mandy is no longer just a therapist but a friend who I will be forever grateful to for walking the extra mile with me.
Gillian, Accountant, Divorced, 38- years old
TUPs was an extremely practical and effective course which provided useful tools to manage real-life situations. The skills learnt will be applicable and relevant for years to come. I highly recommend the course.
Janine, Director, Married, 35- years old, one child
After relocating to a new country and job with my young family I faced myself facing a significant amount of pressure and really struggled to make the adaption. The pressure brought out the worst in me and through the TUPS program I regained my perspective. The program was well structured, accessible and well supported. The fundamentals of the course street easily applied after its completion. I would highly recommend the TUPS program to friends and colleagues who are trying to restore a sense of perspective and balance to their lives.
Rob, CEO, Married, 50- years, two children
I decided to write you this mail after hearing a song that came up on my playlist this morning. For some reason this song resonated with me more than anything during the darkest days. I had not heard the song in several months, but when I heard it this morning I had to stop it at three different points as I was so overcome with emotion. It was like the song reminded me of every feeling that I had. The hopelessness, the depression and the hate I felt for myself and for the world. This might sound really depressing, but honestly, I really feel like I needed it. Time really does heal wounds, but I think it also makes us forget some of the trauma we’ve been through. Listening to that song this morning made me realise how far I’ve come. It made me feel so proud of all the work I’ve done to get to this point. But most of all it made me feel grateful that I am no longer dealing with these feelings. My life is far from perfect, but today I realized that my life is pretty awesome. I'm definitely not saying I have it all figured out. Perhaps one day some of the feelings will creep back in, but knowing that I overcame this once, is all the motivation I need to do so again. So many are struggling with the same issues and many of them do not have the means to acquire the support I did. I really just wanted to thank you for everything you did for me and for everything you do for so many women and couples every day. Looking back on the period from August 2019 – January 2020, I honestly don’t know how I survived. It still feels silly talking about emotional and mental turmoil like it has physical symptoms, but I believe it does. I can still remember feeling like I couldn't breathe. Once I started seeing you, I learned to understand my emotions. I learned how to deal with my triggers and I started to return my focus to the positive things, like my amazing husband and beautiful son. You played such a vital part in getting me to this point. Thank you so much for helping me to get my life and my sanity back. I really hope you are doing well and that 2020 has not been too rough for you. I can imagine that it must be tough having to listen to everyone’s problems and having your own to deal with as well. Especially in a year like this.
Please take good care of yourself, the world needs you!
Amber, CA, Married, 45- years, one child
I’d struggled with infertility for over 2 years by the time I got to see Dr Tony Rodriques at Medfem.
After a thorough assessment a few key issues were identified and managed accordingly.
1 major factor that Dr highlighted was my stress levels and encouraged me to set up an appointment with Mandy Rodrigues in order to effectively manage my stress through her program. This stress wasn’t caused by lockdown or specifically by infertility, but more based on my own thinking patterns and triggers. My heightened levels of anxiety and need to control and perfect everything. I came to Mandy as an emotional, broken, anxiety crippled wreck. Wanting to resign from my job, feeling worthless and quite depressed. We started her TUPS Stress Management Program. (Naturally my pre course assessment scores were high- always been a high achiever, but in this case it was a very unhealthy situation). Through the course I identified triggers, and unhealthy thinking patterns. I came to grips with deep underlying family and friendship relationship issues and healed my traumas in more than one way. In the final month of my sessions, I was starting to accept that IVF might be my route to having a child, and it was through the sessions with Mandy that I found that acceptance. I had calmed down with my need for control and perfection and started feeling hopeful again. In the week of my 8th session I discovered that I was pregnant. My journey with infertility at this point had been 2 years and 9 months. I had been able to conceive naturally during my stress management program. I did the post course assessments the week after and every single indicator that had been disturbingly high at the beginning had come down to within normal ranges. In 2 short months, my entire life had changed and I can directly attribute it to the work of Mandy’s TUPS Stress Management program. My husband who struggles with TUPS and burn out also found enormous value in what I shared with him each week. I would strongly recommend following the course if you find yourself overly anxious, depressed or stressed in everyday life, and if infertility is a contributing worry.
Bridget, Own Company Recruitment, Married, 31- years, one child
Since completing the course, I have definitely found it easier to recognise triggers and to work through them before they manifest into physical stress. Things such as running late, getting caught in traffic and other situations that are largely beyond my control do not cause the same anger and irritability that they used to before. In a moment of stress, I am better able to talk through what is causing the actual stress and work through it before it escalates as a perfectionist, it was often difficult to let go of a mistake made at work, a messy house when people came to visit, or a task left incomplete. The program helps to recognise when these expectations of myself are unrealistic and causing unnecessary anxiety. Although this is definitely still a work in progress, I have definitely noticed an improvement in this area. A big advantage of doing the course as a couple is that we were able to talk about each other’s triggers so that we have a better understanding of what causes the other partner’s stress. We are now able to help each other identify signs of stress earlier so we can manage them quickly. We are also able to articulate as to what is causing any stress or irritability between us before it turns into a fight. As a result we spend more time together, without distractions, which has had an immensely positive effect on our relationship.
Nicola, Actuarial Scientist, Married, 31- years, one child
I am truly grateful for the opportunity to grow, learn and meaningfully change my thought processes. The impact has been lasting and memorable. I found the course enlightening and thought provoking. It has the ability to be a real game changer in a person's life.
Jen, Company Director, Married, 35- years, one child